TRACTOR MEME

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I had a dream last night. In this dream, I was playing guitar and singing gibberish, like I usually do.

And then, all of a sudden, God dropped a John Deere tractor on me. And He said "WILL YA STOP ALREADY?"

And I said "Mmpf."

And He said "Spread this throughout the whole land of cyberspace: No more high-pitched whining. NO MORE! I've had enough. Have a nice day."

And He waved His magic wand, and now I'm sitting at the computer, etc.

RANDY RAY SIDES "TOP TEN REASONS I'M TAKING TIME AWAY FROM FACEBOOK"

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Just kidding, Dolson.

KENNETH V. FLETCHER IS A SUPERGENIUS


This guitar study is dedicated to my wonderful friend, mentor, and role model, Ken Fletcher, who is leaving it all behind for a resort island in Europe. I owe you a lot, Ken. Thank you.

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I'VE DEVELOPED A UNIQUE GUITAR METHOD!


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FIFTY-FIVE FICTION

One birthday, I received a book from my brother called The World's Shortest Stories (edited by Steve Moss). Each story contained the four elements that define a story (setting, characters, conflict, and resolution), but each was exactly 55 words long.

The concept is called Fifty-Five Fiction.

It is a complete genre unto itself, and there exist a number of published collections as well as a web site devoted entirely to the genre. Each story must have 55 words -- no more, no less. So I decided to take up the challenge. Here's my Fifty-Five Fiction story:

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COLD

Lost in the blizzard and hunkered down, I would awaken periodically to howling blackness. But the warm coccoon of my Dad's tight embrace would comfort me.

So when, finally, my eyes opened to the glare of flashlights and the barking of bloodhounds, it was a horrible bittersweet.


Because I awoke saved.


But I awoke cold.


RANDY RAY SIDES